Loyalty - A Virture Becoming Extinct

I have been coming across numerous graphics lately with statements that shout out important messages and catch my attention as well as cause me to ponder on the subject matter for quite some time.  One of those is the one I've posted above.  "Never push a loyal person to the point where they no longer care".  Wow!  That is such a strong and quite true statement. 

What do you think about this statement?

Blessings.

Jeannette

Using our Bodies for Goodness

Hello Everyone:

Today, I simply want to share a graphic to speak for me.  There is nothing more fulfilling in life than to bless someone else with human dignity and care, and better yet, to be on the receiving end of that gracious treatment.  Yes, let's be more mindful of how we use our bodies, our voices, our ears, our hands, our minds, and our hearts.  

What a difference we can make or impact someone's day, and perhaps life, by the way we treat them.  Think on this; ponder this thought for a moment.  Have you been affected by someone in a way that has created a lasting memory in you?

May we treat others in a positive way, the way we want to be treated ourselves.  

Blessings on your day, 

Jeannette

Self Regulating - Emotional Outbursts and Other Conundrums

  

              

Have you ever been around someone who seems to be frustrated with life in general?  They get angry at the smallest issues that to others might illicit a big chuckle at themselves, with a self thought similar to “oh geez, can’t believe I did that, or that happened, or he/she said or did that!”  Instead, the angry person lashes out in a negative emotional outburst that instantly cause distress in the individual and to anyone within hearing or viewing distance.  The repercussions of such action or verbalization are an unwanted or unneeded distraction and inconvenience most individuals would rather not experience. 

I can speak directly for myself, and that it affects me from a mild to high degree, depending upon the event intensity.  The reason for various degrees is because it stems from numerous traumatic and abusive events in my life that has caused post traumatic stress syndrome effects and a more sensitive reactive emotional system.  However, in speaking with others, it is also just common sense that others do not want to be involved in someone else’s “drama” or “personal business”.  Besides, if another person’s anger at a situation is directed externally rather than internally, an innocent person becomes a target rather than a bystander.  Blaming can also occur without the toxic person taking responsibility for one’s actions.

My understanding of taking responsibility is being able to self regulate our own emotions so that we can monitor and react appropriately to all situations.  Self-regulation is defined by Daniel Goleman, author of What Makes a Leader as "the ability to control or redirect disruptive impulses and moods and the propensity to suspend judgment - think before acting."  He adds that the hallmarks of this regulation are "trustworthiness and integrity, comfort and ambiguity, and openness to change." That is to say, there are times that we will naturally be angry, sad, frustrated, elated, happy, etc.  However, there is a time and place for them all.  As the bible says in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8: New Living Translation (NLT)

A Time for Everything

¹ For everything there is a season,
a time for every activity under heaven.

² A time to be born and a time to die.

A time to plant and a time to harvest.

³ A time to kill and a time to heal.

A time to tear down and a time to build up.

⁴ A time to cry and a time to laugh.

A time to grieve and a time to dance.

⁵ A time to scatter stones and a time to gather stones.

A time to embrace and a time to turn away.

⁶ A time to search and a time to quit searching.

A time to keep and a time to throw away.

⁷ A time to tear and a time to mend.

A time to be quiet and a time to speak.

⁸ A time to love and a time to hate.

A time for war and a time for peace.

With that in mind, we also need to be aware of our environment and those in our presence and monitor our actions and reactions, “be in the moment”, not emotionally attack those who are truly blameless and “man up” or “woman up” as the adults we should be.  We should also teach our children from the time they are born to be respectful, loving, responsible little humans so that they will grow up to be healthy responsible adults who own up to their emotions, actions, reactions, and behaviors.  We should help them learn to regulate their emotions as their personalities are formed.  Hot tempered brats who bully, blame others, are callous, or even give hollow apologies need to be guided, directed and taught that behavior in that manner is not acceptable – period – as a child – and surely not in civil adult society. 

  

I have personally suffered through so many close relationships where I took the stand that I would suck up my own emotions of hurt, disdain, stress, nervousness, blame, mistrust, low self-esteem, low self-worth, thinking that part of the angry outburst could possibly be my fault, or just simply allowing it to continue because I didn’t want to argue about the incident to cause more emotional turmoil and “set off” the emotionally angry person any further. However, the graphic below also represents the strong and mature reason I don't argue with a person - they are just plain foolish!

I take a different approach now to conflict.  I value myself enough to protect myself from being emotionally invaded by someone else’s emotional vomiting, whether it is a small hiccup type spit or a full on gut wrenching stomach emptying of his or her negative emotions, most often inaccurately directed at me, rather than themselves.  My approach to someone's inappropriate anger varies, depending or their ability to communicate, I may:

·        Immediately remove myself from the toxic person’s presence to limit continued explosive outbursts

·        Remain in toxic person’s presence for a short time, if possible and if they have calmed down, and discuss the matter in an adult and calm manner

·        Remain in toxic person’s presence for specific time period (i.e. 5 minutes) to allow a sincere apology to occur (without me saying anything, especially prompting or asking for a response or apology)

·        Isolate myself to a peaceful place and decompress and calm down

·        Deep breathing to calm down, relax, and bring oxygen back to my body

·        Journalize, listen to music, do something enjoyable (art, Pinterest, craft)

·        Go for a pleasant drive alone

·        Visit a friend

·        Go for a swim

As I quickly approach another milestone adult birthday, I become wiser, practice lessons learned from the life university of “hard knocks”, years of counseling, wise family and friends influence, and strong Christian faith spiritual grounding.  I realize implementing many of these learned awakenings would have saved me many hardships and years of heartache and emotional pain.  Yet, I am also aware that the negative experiences have given me an opportunity to have strength and firsthand knowledge to help another woman navigate through their own life experience that may be challenging them.  I savor the positive experiences I’ve been grateful to have had and ask for God’s grace to show me ways to utilize the lessons learned through the not so positive ones.

Last thoughts. Take a deep cleansing breath and start the next moment again with a new perspective.  Thank you to our Lord Jesus Christ for his ever loving patience, compassion, guidance, and strength.  To God be the glory for his ever presence.  Last but not least, to the Holy Spirit for his prompting and reminders that help in keeping me grounded and focused on God's priorities in my life, not my own. 

Praying that you are blessed.

Jeannette

My Tribute

(To God Be the Glory)

Me - Cross behind me on wall - My Tribute and Lasting Testimony

This song has been one of my favorites since I was in my 20's.  It signifies and portrays in words what my own heart wishes to express to our Lord.  The lyrics are a type of testimony to how I like to live my life, and have been trying to live it for over 50 years.    

My Tribute

Author Artist: Andrae Crouch

 [Verse:]

How can I say thanks 

for the things You have done for me?

Things so undeserved, 

yet You gave to prove Your love for me;

the voices of a million angels

could not express my gratitude.

All that I am and ever hope to be, 

I owe it all to Thee.

[Chorus 1:]

To God be the glory,

to God be the glory,

to God be the glory 

for the things He has done.

[Chorus 2:]

With His blood He has saved me,

with His power He has raised me;

to God be the glory 

for the things He has done.

[Bridge:]

Just let me live my life,

let it pleasing, Lord to Thee,

and if I gain any praise,

let it go to Calvary.

[Chorus 2]

Additional song verse:

For thine is the kingdom,

And the power, and the glory,

Forever, Amen

When my mother passed away this past April, I sang this to her lifeless body minutes after she departed for heaven and also shared it at her memorial service.  My hope was that her friends and family could know of her own testimony and Christian faith and be touched by Christ's love in their own lives.  In my twenties, I was blessed to be able to sing My Tribute as a solo in my little church in Alaska.  To God Be the Glory!

Mother

I hope that you enjoyed reading and soaking in the lovely words, now, try listening to the way they sound in song with music and repeated verses.  It’s so very lovely and such a great praise song to God.  Here is a video clip you will enjoy of the song performed by an internationally known Norway soprano artist, Sissel Kyrkjebø and the Oslo gospel choir (a really nice jazzy version):   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiB4SEgOkow.

May the Lord bless and keep you.  May he shine his light upon you and be gracious unto thee. 

(Three generations of praying hands: grandma, mom, my sister, me)

Jeannette

Safe and Secure in a Special Space

Daydreaming and praying while envisioning each prayer request and thought are very similar.  Yet, praying in that manner is so much more fulfilling, because there becomes a two way dialogue, with the Holy Spirit communicating in my heart while I communicate with my prayer thoughts.  This occurred this afternoon.   I was trying to take a nap to catch up on some snooze time.  My way of relaxing and meditating is to do imagining (visualizing) exercises and to pray as well.

Today's focus in my meditating - calming - relaxing - praying phase was to imagine myself being in a bed type bubble that had filtered air.  I'm sure my CPAP machine for my sleep apnea must have something to do with this part of the daydream or thought.  So, the bubble first looked like an oval, almost like a pill capsule type shape.  Then I started thinking about it and praying and talking to God about the shape being more like the interior portion of a large canopy bed.  I imagined a tall dome type French style canopy bed with a gentle bell shape curve coming from the four posts and connecting in the center with a decorative finial topping the connection.  The bed material could be brass or even better, richly upholstered tufted in deep plum or raspberry velvet, so that it would be a delightful tactile experience to engulf me in comfort while able to breathe easy, enclosed in a healthy bubble.  This special rectangular bed bubble would also be wrapped with high density opalescent Plexiglas.  It would have all the safety and comfort features built in, such as private water sealed entrance/exit with push button ease, alarm sensor for optimal privacy, surround sound music system, automatic temperature control, and any feature a woman needing pampering can imagine for excellent sleeping health.

Ah, I'm starting to feel a little more relaxed just thinking about this again.

So, where does the praying tie in to all of this?  Can you really daydream about a bed and call it a prayer?  Give me a break!  Right?  

Well, let me explain that my time with the Lord in meditation, thought and prayer wasn't just about an air bubble bed.  The purpose of the prayer and reaching out to God was precipitated by being upset, tired, distressed, and in great need to feel safe, protected, and just able to get some good sleep.  You see, I haven't been sleeping well lately.  Not that this is anything new, I have a history of not sleeping well many days of the week.  However, when I am emotionally upset over something and can't let it go enough to get that deep relaxation and REM sleep, then, my sleep becomes impaired and I start trying to wind down, deep breath, imagine being in an environment that is peaceful (usually imagine a waterfall and outdoors - tropical forest or mountains).  So, today, I was laying in bed under my cutesy pink shabby chic ruffled sheets and fluffy comforter in its pink shabby chic rouched duvet cover getting all comfy, feet propped up just so, sleep mask on, ear plugs in to block sound, CPAP mask on and breathing good air.  Ah, let the relaxation and eventual sleep begin .....  However, it usually takes me quite awhile to fall asleep during the daytime.

Okay, the other part of the prayer involves me feeling protected and feeling safe from any harm.  Whoa you say where did that come from?!  Well, I’m just like everyone else, my life is not pain free or perfect, so I try to use coping skills to make it better for myself, to recenter my world, to bring happiness and well being back.

So, I started thinking about what type of armor I would need to have on my body to prevent something from hurting me, weighing me down, causing me to feel depressed, unmotivated, just basically not feeling like the great person that I actually am (at least that is what so many people tell me!).  Then I started thinking about how God has made so many different types of animals and insects with built in protective armor of varying degrees, which keep them safe.  Some of them I thought of are: (1) porcupine, (2) turtle, (3) armadillo, (4) rolly polly bug, (5) crab, and other types with shell type skins that are hard to the touch.  I have no idea where I got these ideas, but I was just praying about my emotional safety and security and asking for the Lord to cover me with his love and his protection (like pouring warm honey all over your body that brings instant nurturing feeling and comfort).  

So - "SAFE AND SECURE IN A SPECIAL SPACE" - is the topic focus.

The first special space to feel safe and secure was the air bubble bed.  Ahhhh, sleeping like a pampered lady.

The second special space I mentioned was one's body, using the examples of animal’s or insect’s bodies with armor defenses.

The third one was in God's care, feeling his care, love, and presence.  This can occur in so many different ways to each individual person.  I gave one strange example of a feeling of having warm honey being poured all over your body - it’s just a sensation to feel warmed.  A better example would be to have a great quilt or soft comforter wrapped all around you with just enough tightness to feel as if someone is hugging you with love and at the same time guarding and protecting you.  

For me, the Lord God allows the Holy Spirit to bring comfort and a sense of fulfillment and an "everything is going to be okay now” feeling.  I most often get little butterfly type feelings in my stomach (not nervousness) but sort of like confirmation type feelings that let me know it's okay, and that I'm not alone in whatever it is that I'm going through in my life.  God is in my space, and he has gently lifted me into his special space and allowed me to hang out with him until I'm feeling better.  

PRAYER - yes, this is where prayer comes in.  The bible talks about "ask and you shall receive".  You see, God already knows what we need before we even ask for it.  Yet, I think the act of asking does all kinds of things for us (recognition, accountability, the act of verbalizing/thought processing the request).

So, what's the purpose in this specific blog topic?  One is that I wanted to let the readers know that God is a safe and secure person to be around and connect with.  Two is that praying doesn't have to be a formal type "Dear God, thank you for our food ....”  It can flow out of you like a conversation you would have with your best friend, or with your beloved grandmother who you trust immensely.  Or, praying with meditating, daydreaming, visualizing, as I wrote about.  It's very awesome to just be yourself and pray like you speak, that way your heart can be open and your mind can be cleared of troubles, requests and praises.

Reader friend, thank you in advance for being interested in the subject and taking the time to read the entire post.  I look forward to your comments and to responding to your messages.

May our God bless your day, your week, and your life!

Jeannette

ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS

I just love this phrase “Actions speak louder than words”.  It’s such a plain and simple sentence that tells me that what I do far outweighs anything that I could say in words alone.  The first example that comes to mind is to tell someone “I love you”.  However, if I were to treat the person unkind, ignore them to the point they felt uncomfortable being around me, speak to them in a very unloving manner, show them in other ways that I wasn’t very loving towards them; then my words of love toward them wouldn’t mean very much.  My actions would obviously take precedence over my words, thus, out weighing my actions.

So it goes when someone apologizes to me, but then repeats the same types of behaviors with similar types of apologies; the words of apologies takes second place to the repetitive actions or behaviors.

But it also goes for the positive things in our lives.  When we take actions on words that we say, it makes such an impact, it can really turn around a person’s day from perhaps a mediocre one, to a great one.  For instance, we may think, wow, that waitress did an amazing job for us during our meal.  So, we may follow through with a genuine verbal compliment to directly to her.  We may even take it a step further and take action and leave her a tip or perhaps ask for the manager and express our admiration for the great employee’s service to further advance praise about the waitress.

There have been experiences in my life that have blessed me in which others have taken action beyond just words and directed them to me.  Most times they have come when I least expect them, and many times from people I had no idea would express such kind actions or words to me.  Two specific examples were associated with my involvement with a women’s shelter, as a former resident.  The first as a Board member of the shelter, when another Board member commented that she would never had known that I was homeless and in a shelter at one time because “I was just like her (an employed professional)”.  That was a high compliment coming from a V.P. of Human Resources from a large Hospital.  She took her words and took action by speaking and showing me her admiration.  Another example connected to the shelter was that of another former resident who expressed her desire to be my “little sister” adoptee because of how I had changed her life and brought her back to her religion (Muslim; and I’m Christian!).  Her words and action – big, big, big hug and tears, blessed me beyond measure.

My life took a little turn around the time my uncle Pat passed away.  I remember thinking at that time that it was sad that such a wonderful man would not be on the earth to enjoy.  He was a happy man, so full of joy, he smiled so much of the time, seemed to have good things to say, positive attitude, just a joyful man, loved by his wife and three daughters and grandchildren.  I knew he would be missed by all that loved him.  Sitting at his memorial service, it was enjoyable to a point, hearing about all the wonderful attributes about my uncle.  But at the same time, I was struck by how important it must be to share with everyone I care about, the wonderful attributes they possess.  In the present, not at their memorial services.  Although very respectful, I felt it would be more respectful to share my admiration directly to them while they were alive. 

This was a turning point in my life.  It started me on a phase where I started sharing with my loved one more of my true feeling toward them, sharing my love, care, respect, fun stories, admiration, etc.  At the same time, I also felt a need to hear from them how they felt about me.  I needed their honesty, and wanted some lasting memories to fill me and to fill my memory book.

This brings me to one big point that I have been making with my family and friends for the past 10 years.  That is LET’S TELL ONE ANOTHER THE GOOD THINGS WE LIKE AND LOVE ABOUT ONE ANOTHER, THE FUN STORIES, AND OLD TIMES.  WHY DON’T WE SHARE THESE THINGS WHILE WE ARE LIVING?  NOT WHEN WE ARE GONE.  NOT AT OUR MEMORIAL SERVICES WHEN WE CAN NOT HEAR THEM, WE CAN NOT KNOW HOW OTHERS FELT ABOUT US IN ENDEARING WAYS.  SHARE THE LOVE, RESPECT AND APPRECIATION TO THE PERSON’S EARS NOW.  SHOW THEM WITH OUR ACTIONS NOW – NOT WHEN IT IS TOO LATE – WHEN THEY ARE DECEASED.

At my 50^th and 55^th birthday parties, I initiated them myself so that I could enjoy my friends and celebrate these milestone “growing older” birthdays without feeling depressed, but rather embrace them with my most special friends.  I asked each one of them to share a special memory or story with me about our relationship so that I had something I could put in my memory book to keep for years to come (no gifts were allowed! ).  What a blessings these friends gave me by taking action on their words and writing out their thoughts.  On my 55^th birthday, I asked if they would also give me a copy of their favorite 4x6 photo of themselves.  Oh, that was so much fun, and it such a joy to have that for my memory book.

For me personally, I would love it if my family and friends would:

·       Sing me a song

·       Write me a letter

o   Tell me directly something positive about me; about our relationship; about any impact I’ve made on your life

·       Tell me while I’m alive to hear, not at my memorial service

o   I really, really need heartfelt uplifting thoughts and stories

The story that I wrote about my mother for her 80^th birthday party with close family and friends, was lovingly well accepted by her and her guests.  She recently passed away in April 2013, and parts of this same 6 page story were used at both of her memorial services by two different men who gave eulogies.  It was such a blessing that she heard the accolades, funny stories and all of her accomplishments while she was alive.  It was also nice that those who attended her services also heard about mom’s life from the family’s perspective as well.

I am so very glad that mom was able to hear me read her story out loud to her at her 80^th birthday celebration among those who cared so deeply for her.  I can still remember seeing her facial expressions of happiness, joy, embarrassment, accomplishment, achievement, fortitude, girlish grin and so many more wonderful expressions of her personality.  It was so much fun watching her and listening to her laugh, and her responses, and her responses to others’ comments.  That story and my action of reading it to her at the party was my special gift to her, and it was also her gift to me, especially the JOY it gave her.  It was nice to see her listening to the story and watch her responses while she was alive.  At her memorial services, others added information to the stories afterwards, but believe me, hearing them while mom was alive was much more precious!

So, I encourage beginning some type of ACTION today to make your words greater.  Those of you who use Facebook as a means of communication: post a meaningful personal or board message declaring some wonderful thing about your friend or family.  Start a little movement: post a kind thought, and ask that others “pay it forward” to someone else.

Or better yet, send someone you care about a card and write a nice thought, story or endearment in it.  You would be amazed how little effort it takes to make someone feel special and loved.

My Aunt Eileen sent me a package with a lovely letter and copies of old childhood photographs, soon after my mother passed away a few months ago.  It was so unexpected and it was so lovely and loving.  She is extremely thoughtful.  After my Grandma Grace passed away a few years ago, she mailed me a handmade cross bookmark with “Amazing Grace” machine embroidered into an absolutely beautiful piece of art.  Her kindness and act of love was and is so very special.  Words would never be able to supersede her actions.  (Thank you Aunt Eileen.  I love you.)

Whatever it is that you decide to do to EXPRESS how you CARE about someone.  Or however you take ACTION in your lives to show others your WORDS are special, I know that it will have meaning and will cause someone to feel good.  But please consider taking that action now.  Do not hesitate.

ACTIONS REALLY DO SPEAK LOUDER THAN OUR WORDS.

Blessings on your day.

                                      Jeannette

MOM – Grant Me the Serenity

I titled this post, MOM – Grant Me the Serenity, because my sweet mother hung that saying in the format of a sign in our childhood home and let me know that it was one of her favorite sayings.  Here is the complete saying (above and below), commonly known as the Serenity Prayer, by the American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr (1892–1971)  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Serenity_Prayer:

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, The courage to change the things I can, And wisdom to know the difference.

Our Mother, Dortha, was a unique person, as all mothers are.  She passed away almost four months ago, unexpectedly, without the chance of me being able to tell her that I love her in my own special way, or that I appreciate all that she has done for me, or any of the numerous thoughts or feelings I have had for her for so many years.  My moment of opportunity slipped right past me with the force of three horrible brain strokes that forever changed her life, her brain, and caused her life to end in a manner I was not quite prepared for.

Our sweet Mother

          

We were taught by Mom, and in our church and Sunday school classes that our life could end “in the twinkling of an eye” as the bible says in 1 Corinthians 15:52.   We always knew that life expectancy was, as Grandma Grace would say,  “until the good Lord wants to take us home to be with him in Heaven”.  Yet we knew as well that statistically a normal life span in our family was approximately 50 – 100 years, according to our family genetics (Grandma Grace passed away two years ago and she was just 2 months short of  being 103 years of age !)  However, even with this spiritual and logical knowledge, nothing really prepared me for the final loss of my beloved Mother.

Mom had a deep faith in our Lord Jesus Christ from the time she was a small child until the very last moment she breathed life.  As I’ve shared with others at her memorial service, and many before and since, she lived her life centered around her beliefs, her faith, her convictions and her Christian commitment.  She was a Christian woman who truly enjoyed studying God’s holy word – the Bible – taking notes from the time she was a teenager, usually in shorthand that she wrote in notebooks or steno pads.  One woman from her hometown church commented to me that one of her fondest memories of my Mother over fifty years was seeing her taking copious notes during sermons at church, knowing they were even written in difficult shorthand.  

Her strong commitment to live her life in a manner that would encourage others to believe in the Lord as well, drove her to silently influence others in a spiritually positive way and let her "light shine" to show her "good works" so that others would "glorify" the Father (Lord) as the bible says in Matthew 5:16.  She felt very strongly about not causing someone to stumble or sin by her actions (Matthew 18:8-9).  So much so, that she refused to drink any alcohol at all – zero – zip – nothing – not even a sip.  Mom had her personal reasons, and there was no one nor any reason to convince her otherwise.  

Mom had a way of influencing me that may not have seemed very grand at the time that her words or actions occurred, but the result of the influence made lasting changes in my life.  One very clear discussion we had together was when I was approximately 14 years old.  I remember that I was having a not so great day, and she picked up on my attitude.  No, I have no clue what I was saying, or how I was behaving, or what type of issues surrounded this particular discussion.  However, I do remember what she said:

“You have the ability to change your attitude at any moment, at any second.  It’s up to you.”

This comment forever changed the way I thought about how I behaved, how much power I had over my own emotions, how quickly a moment in time could change things, changing my own attitude could be impactful, and just how easy it could be to make that change.  When I was 35 years old, I came across another quote, by Charles Swindoll, that correlated quite well with my Mother’s statement 21 years earlier.  The poem is known as:

ATTITUDE

“The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.  Attitude, to me, is more important than facts.  It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think, say or do.  It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill.  It will make or break a company… a church… a home.  The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we embrace for that day.  We cannot change our past… we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way.  We cannot change the inevitable.  The only thing we can do is play the one string we have, and that is our attitude… I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.

And so it is with you… we are in charge of our Attitudes”

It is delightful when a parent’s influence can be thought of as positive, not negative.  Yes, I say that because I was talking to someone the other day and we were saying in a joking way about blaming parents for this or that negative things in our lives.  When in fact, we must take responsibility as healthy adults, for the results of all our influences and choices.  I am very grateful that I had Christ-centered mentoring from my Mom.

Today, I added a graphic (below) post on my Facebook page in honor of my Mom.  The image expressed what I feel today in my grieving time for her.  The words said: 

“When someone you love dies, you never quite get over it … You just learn to slowly go on without them … But ALWAYS keeping them tucked safely within your heart.”

I often think of both Mom and Grandma Grace and how each impacted my life in different ways, both special, yet unique.  Grandma had a straight-forward yet gentle and loving  approach, wrapped up with cuddly warmness like a soft homemade quilt and warm peach cobbler on beautiful pink rose antique china.  Mom had a practical and logical advice style from a legal and analytical viewpoint coupled with a “What would Jesus do?” check and balance system, along with an "I know you can do it", "you’re strong", "come on over" and I’ll tell you about my latest read or women’s group and just get comfortable.  Each had a way of calming my nerves, building my comfort zone up to safety standards, giving me the freedom to be “me”, understanding and accepting my own uniqueness and differences, and loving me for them.

My husband and I have a new home with a very special corner garden we have designated as our “Memorial Rose Garden” in honor of our deceased mothers, Dortha and Pauline, and for my Grandma Grace.  We bought our house with gorgeous roses already blooming in the front corner of the yard and we are purchasing special items to memorialize our loved ones.  It will be a serene and quiet place to reflect on the lives of those we have loved.  His niece Kelly will also be remembered lovingly as well.

So, back to the God Grant Me the Serenity theme.  The memorial garden invites us to abide by the Serenity Prayer when thinking of loved ones, changing attitudes despite a situation or environment and engaging us in the prayer, being thankful for positive influences and grateful for getting through negative influences reminds us of the prayer.  

Mom had a way of teaching philosophy without labeling it as such.  To her it would have been just common sense, respect, good people skills, as well as  Christ like behavior.  

Thank you Mom.  I love you.  You will always be in my heart.  You will always be in my life because you have influenced me in ways I haven’t even discovered yet.  And thank you God for the Mom that you gave me.  Rest in peace Mom.

Blessings to you all.

Jeannette